Month: November 2016

I am thankful for many things but today it’s the simple things. Pediatricians who see sick kids quickly and prescribe medicine. Pharmacies who get it done and grandparents who rush around with me. My daughter was diagnosed with pneumonia, of all things, and I predict will feel much better by the holiday. Better enough, at least, to eat.

I am tremendously thankful for my children and their health, my family, friends, and the roof over my head. The simple things. I try to remind myself of this every day.

I am also really thankful and proud of the work I was asked to do for Epilepsy Awareness Month in November. I had the honor of speaking on a panel and on a radio show and I am appearing in that public service announcement I talked about, produced by CBS Chicago. Thank you for all the wonderful feedback and most importantly, your support.

CBS 2 Chicago Epilepsy Awareness

 

I have never answered “yes” faster than I did the request to be part of a local public service announcement for epilepsy. At least a private, cheering “yes!” One of Chicago’s finest crews – CBS – honored me with the role for Epilepsy Awareness Month this November thanks to contacts at the Epilepsy Foundation. Before I knew it I was chatting with the awesome hair and makeup artist and soon sitting on a stool in front of a green screen and camera. Like riding a bike for a former newscaster. I will share it as soon as it’s ready.

I had a great experience meeting really hard-working, energetic, sincere people. I even told them a part of me hoped I would have a seizure during my shoot there, just so they could see why I wanted to spread the word. I’m not sure they believed I really hoped for one, but I never did anyway. I am proud that I agreed to introduce myself in this PSA as someone living with epilepsy – sharing the video of this on air seizure with viewers and with you. The Seizure

For the first time in almost six years, I can say I took control of this. I want to share it so it can help someone recently diagnosed or even someone just wondering what it looks like. I have had thousands, countless episodes, with no control. Only others who have them can understand the terrifying feeling. In my case it’s an inability to speak when a voice in the back of my brain is screaming “No! I’m fine! Just give me a minute to come back.” This is particularly hard for someone who talks too much. The seizure I’m sharing has been viewed more than a half million times. This one prefaced every job interview I have had since I looked to get out of news. This one came after countless on air seizures that I successfully read right through (later asking a co-anchor “Did I just make sense?”) This one was so traumatic, some of the people closest to me in life have never watched.

I certainly have to take responsibility, having stayed in broadcast news with an epilepsy diagnosis. I found a positive side to the misfiring brain journey, using the TV role to ask for community support for the 1 in 26. I served on the board for the Epilepsy Foundation in Madison, WI and worked with Lily’s Fund and CURE to spread the word. I am now doing the same in Chicago where I had a record marathon raising funds for the Epilepsy Foundation here. EFGC  I am already signed up for the 2017 team.

The truth is, I am tired of this community being an afterthought in the health care and fundraising worlds. Most of us can agree that the face of the condition itself, with dozens of different kids of seizures, doesn’t help. Most have unfair expectations of those of use who don’t necessarily look like anything is wrong. Everything from schools to landlords to employers to courts.

My current lack of driver’s license, much less temporary than expected, is due to my condition. I lost it between my diagnosis in 2008 and surgery in 2010 due to tonic clonic, formerly known as “grand mal” seizures. Doctors found a brain tumor and removed it in 2010, which improved medical problems and solved the license problem. Five years later, last winter, I had a surprising setback that stripped me of the ability to drive again. I can certainly hope for a license in the future but I have to make plans to function otherwise. Nothing is more heart breaking or disappointing in my effort than being told I need to “live with it.” That my driving issue is “not insurmountable” as it relates to being a single mom. It would be foolish for me to grab a set of keys and drive, so I won’t. I pray for change but can’t force a brain to stop misfiring. Seizures are certainly one of those things we can’t always fight. I refuse to allow any lack of understanding or awareness to be added to the list.

The painful hurdles in life make us stronger, so my new goal is to become a body builder. While I am sore from daily curve balls, no one is stronger than die-hard Cubs fans. It is surreal to say they are playing in the World Series for the first time in 71 years. Not that anyone noticed.

I love the Cubs, but I certainly never lost sleep over their ups and downs since I entered the picture nearly 41 years ago. Until now. It’s a great distraction. I know my family members in heaven are partying hard. Great-uncle Emil was part of the chair he sat in where he and Grandpa Frank made the Cubs a central part of their bachelor pad background. Uncle Jay listened to every game with the sound off on the TV. His preferred radio announcer and a chewing tobacco tin were regulars. The memory hasn’t faded a bit. Everyone agrees while these guys would roll their eyes at the current price of tickets, they would love the Cubs at bat.

 

I was born and raised in Oak Park, the first suburb west of Chicago. To city natives, if I say I’m “from” Chicago I offend… but for most of us, it’s just easier and cool. I have countless childhood and teenage memories of being at Wrigley Field. When I was little, it felt like a religious service when I went to a game with my dad and a friend. I also got to march on Wrigley with my Oak Park softball team in the summer, when I was young enough to be a ballerina who also swung a bat. As a teenager I’ll admit seeing very few pitches thanks to some cute boy. Going back as a grown up was a great combination of Chi-town religion and relationships.

 

I left home base after high school, sinking into the cheese for almost 20 years, starting with school in Wisconsin. The Badgers were an obvious choice as far as sports loyalties go, and I feared death threats wearing anything but green and gold as a local newscaster. But I never lost my loyalty to the Cubs. There’s just something about this team.

In the meantime, I wonder where my kids, now 9 and 11, will say they grew up.  I want them to love home base like the rest of us. Born in Wisconsin, they have lived with me in Chicago since they were 5 and 7. Moms are told that babies grow up fast but the warnings don’t prepare us for the reality.

My little guy has spent almost half his life here. Assuming I blink and my kids are in college, will they say they are from Chicago? This is not a competition, I swear. I love Madison, Wisconsin like all Badgers do, but I’d get a very cheesy stare down if I said I grew up there.

I have watched hundreds of friends and strangers hugging and crying and drinking and jumping and screaming and waving their flags when the Cubs take home a “W.” We all need a home base to run to whether we win or lose.

Go Cubs Go.