I am not running the 2015 Chicago Marathon. That sentence is extremely hard to write and the reality hard to face. I’m writing about it now, as a volunteer on the course passing out fluids to the elite runners. I just cheered on the wheelchair athletes with tears in my eyes. 
I’m assiged to a group of high school cross country runners, their coach and a parent. Strangers I’ve gotten to know pretty well since we met up at 5am in the burbs. 
The elite marathoners run something like a five minute mile- and hit our 40K mark by 9:30. I’m excited to see them. And my legs are itching to run, I won’t lie.
My instincts told me to pull out of the race about 6 weeks ago, after training up to 18 miles, because of changes in my epilepsy medication. I’m doing really well and so those same instincts tell me I should share this.
The people at Imerman Angels were wonderful when I got in touch about my need to stay home on race day. Their work, all the non-profits, are the most inspiring of all. I cannot thank them enough for their understanding and generosity. I hope those with cancer or whose loved ones are fighting the battle will be in touch with Imerman, or let me know and I’ll get you there. Donate if you can, too, please.
I feel it is important for me to point out that I’m still running, I even put in 7 miles yesterday. It’s become such a huge part of who I am. I will do the marathon next year, after I turn 40, and break my record. I made the decision to pull out of the 26.2 mile long race because my doctor was adjusting seizure medication and I had no way of knowing how it would impact my training and my health. My health is not as much fun to manage as the pain after a 20 mile training run (I know it sounds nuts) but it is more important.
I also happened to make the decision shortly after I had a scary experience on the path near my house. It had nothing to do with my health but everything to do with how my gut, my instincts, are my best friend. The path is remarkably safe in Elmhurst, Illinois, but I wouldn’t recommend taking it when it’s dark outside. I am often there during the more popular days and times. This experience took place on a Saturday morning in broad daylight with gorgeous weather. Two miles before the path hits the road to go back to my house, I had to pass a guy. This happens all the time, so I thought nothing of it. He was wearing sweats and a hooded sweatshirt, reminded me of Rocky from behind, joggling slowly and shuffling his feet.
Luckily I was running without music so it was obvious to me that just after I passed him, he sped up hard. So I picked up my pace but it didn’t increase the distance between us. I noticed immediately that there was no one in front of me for as long as I could see. I felt a burning in my chest as I ran faster and harder. Luckily, he couldn’t keep up. When I got to the road, I slowed and turned around to make eye contact with Rocky. I was right – he didn’t look trustworthy, not nearly as friendly as Sylvester Stallone, to me at least.
I think of this as it relates to my decision to skip a year of marathon running because I am finally trusting my instincts. Why it has taken nearly 40 years, I wish I knew. But it feels awesome.
Which leads me to the story about a meeting I had at LinkedIn this week. I was given the opportunity through the Epilepsy Foundation of Greater Chicago to speak on a panel and my gut told me to go for it.
It turns out a gentleman who works at LinkedIn started what’s called Enablein. His youngest child was diagnosed with Down Syndrome and he has created (in their words) “an inclusive space to discuss creating opportunity for EVERY member of the economic workforce.” Organizations like the Epilepsy Foundation are partnered with LinkedIn to help people understand the needs of those around them and to truly understand how those with disabilities are often just as able as others. I pointed out during my talk that I often think I am a better employee because I have worked so hard to prove myself. I put up with things I might not otherwise because I know my dream job is in the future.
I was one of two people on the panel to share my story and take questions. I have done this before and I’ll admit I feel like a fly on the wall when it’s happening. I still can’t believe what I experienced and how far I’ve come since. I am proud to share my history and feel like I have a new mission in life to be as open as possible about who I am.
After our panel discussion we were partnered with LinkedIn employees to discuss our goals, ask advice and take a look at our “profiles.” I still have to tweak mine but felt this blog, which I plan to share there soon, was the most important to me on race day.
Running is a huge part of who I am. It makes me a better mom, daughter, girlfriend, friend and employee. I can’t thank those who have reached out to help me and support me enough. I think I fear an overly emotional “thank you” will result.
But my gut says that’s ok.
Seize the Day with Sarah 